Etienne St Clair and his amazing Hair
by donargh
Summary: I know what you're thinking-Under all that hair,what was St. Clair thinking during ATFK? Fear not my fellow lovers of boys with French names and English accents, now you can findout!
1. Chapter 1

**Thanksgiving holidays **

_One shot focussed upon the Saturday after thanks giving, so the third night that Etienne sleeps in Anna's room._

Anna's digital clock ticks over to 1:04 am. The red glow from it illuminates the whole of her impeccably tidy room. I see our shoes, neatly placed by the door. I see Anna's collection of banana and elephant figurines. Even in this light it is clear that each has been carefully positioned in its own little spot instead of randomly sprawled out on her dresser. I turn my attention back to the ceiling and my mind wanders.

Tonight for some reason, sleep is the furthest thing from my mind.

The past two nights have been the best night's sleep I've had in ages. You would think that it would be impossible sleeping in the same room as one of the most beautiful girls going round. But knowing that Anna is just there, at my side, is so comforting, especially after everything that is happening with me mum. Anna just gets it. And in a way I've needed that comfort of knowing that someone understands.

The past couple of weeks have been so hard. I feel so sad about not being there for me mum and angry at my arse of a father. I have become numb to everything that doesn't concern my mother. I call her every day for updates but it isn't enough. She needs me to be with her. She shouldn't be alone. And I need to be there to be assured she is okay, not just hear it from my father.

But he sees to it that I am not with her.

I hate the control he has over my life. In the beginning I yelled and argued with him to let me go to San Francisco. He has this way of twisting my words and manipulating me that is just so completely draining. In the end I knew it was pointless. He had made up his mind and nothing I could do or say would change it. If anything, it would only jeopardise mum more considering he's the one footing her medical bills. He definitely doesn't need my arguing to give him another reason to threat cutting us off.

So instead, I stayed in my bedroom and became numb.

I Ditched class as an act of protest.

Handed in assignments well past their due dates or not at all.

Despite my trying to talk to Ellie, she seems to be more than happy to ignore the issue completely. I tell her about the horrible things my father is doing. She nods and responds when necessary but you can see that look in her eyes, clearly doubting that a charming bloke like my father could ever do or say such a thing. She thinks its best that I stay here, arguing that I need something to distract me from it all.

She definitely helped with the distraction side of things initially. I was desperate to feel anything other than sadness and grief for me mum. We went out, got pissed most nights and ended up back in her bed. That need for her in that way, slowly disappeared as the numbness sunk in. I would try talking to her, but I got the impression that it was always an inconvenience to her. Like she would much rather be anywhere but with me.

I sigh at these thoughts, pushing them out of my mind as I do so.

Suddenly Anna's presence next to me is way too hard to ignore for any longer.

Without moving my head, I glance her way, checking that she is still asleep.

Sometimes I think that my feelings for her are so obvious. I'm certain she catches me staring at her lips all the time. I've looked at them for so long that I'm pretty sure I could pick them out of a line up. They look soft and the lightest shade of apricot. Her bottom lip is round, and juts out a little due to her slight under bite, making it plump and round. I imagine this would make playfully biting said lip easy. Her upper lip is smaller than her lower but round just the same. When she smiles the fact that the upper lip is smaller shows her teeth more, highlighting the gap she has between them. Normally gaps in people's teeth are undesirable but on Anna it only makes me desire her more.

They are lips that I imagine kissing. Lips that I imagine slowly kissing my neck, then trailing down to my shoulder, my chest, my- Whoa, whoa, WHOA, Étienne! Snap OUT OF IT. It's really inappropriate to be having these thoughts. Especially when the owner of those lips and the lips themselves are only centimetres away from me.

Anna gives a long sigh and slightly rolls her body closer to mine, head tilted towards mine. I freeze and stay facing the ceiling. She sighs again and goes back to deep rhythmic breathing, indicating she is fast asleep. Slowly I turn my head to face her. The previous two nights I was so tired that I fell straight to sleep and when I woke up in the morning she was gone, so I never got a chance to just look at her. Her face is no more than three or four centimetres away from mine.

She is so breathtakingly beautiful that it hurts.

Up close I can see the light scattering of freckles on her nose. Her eyelashes are so thick and crazy long. I save looking at her lips for last. They slightly parted and so close to mine that I could die.

She is so oblivious to how amazing she is. My eyes slowly travel down her body, boldly staring at areas of her that I fantasize about, taking in every inch of her. My eyes return, as they always do, to her lips.

The temptation to kiss her has never been so strong. I could do it you know. Kiss her. Inch my lips closer and closer until they slightly brush hers. I wonder if they would be as soft as I've imagined them. They look SO soft. Maybe I can just trace them with my thumb, settle the bet right now.

Apparently I have no self control as during the argument I've been having with myself, I have unconsciously moved my lips so that they are just hovering only a centimetre over Anna's. I snap out of it, quickly moving my head back to its original position.

I freeze thinking that Anna couldn't possibly go on undisturbed, but she continues sleeping as if I didn't just nearly accidentally kiss her.

Gahhhhh! The agony!

I must be out of my bloody mind to put myself through this. I could have simply said good night to her on the first night and went straight back to my room and been none the wiser. My head tells me that this is not the right time. That given the current situation with my mum that things need to stay as normal as possible. That Ellie is normal and that any change with that would just be creating more problems than I need.

And there is no way that I will live up the St. Clair name my father has created. Cheating and lying. Making moves on one woman while still with another. There is no way I would do that to Ellie or Anna.

If I was only more confident that Anna wants me just as much as I want her, this whole thing would be so much easier. How more blatant could I be? I stared the Neruda passage. I've told her she's beautiful. AND I'm sleeping in her bed. If my feelings were any clearer, the president of France would have to give me a cape and shield, and then whole of Europe would address me as Captain Obvious.

I look over to Anna's clock again and see that it is now 1:58. Guess I should sleep. I take one more glance at Anna then close my eyes.

Oh well. Maybe tomorrow when we get crêpes I'll use nutella to write 'I love you' on my fore head...


	2. Chapter 2

**Limbo**

_One shot that goes into further detail of the night of Anna's birthday from Etienne perspective. Authors note at the end._

Gahh.

Anna is seriously doing me head in.

Ever since her birthday, things have definitely been tense between us. Is it possible for one night to be one of the best and one of the worst in my life at the same time?

Someone suggested a study session in the lobby. So here we sit. Meredith, Josh, Rash, myself and Anna. The tension between Anna and I is all wrong. There's always _some_ form of tension- a wall that neither of us cross. But this time it's strained even more.

Rash and Josh are at that annoying state they go in to. The one where they have practically stopped study all together and instead are teasing each other, on the verge of eating each other's faces. Joy.

Meredith is helping Anna with her French essay, both deep in conversation. She so blatantly side stepped my offer of assistance with it, instead opting for Meredith. I notice the pout on Anna's lips as she listens to Mer's explanation of verb tenses. Stupid lips that even look appealing when are being used to assist Anna to form a scow.

How did we get like this? So tense and awkward? Oh yeah, I remember now. Her birthday outing...

I was pissed out of my mind when Anna pulled me out onto the dance floor that I had completely forgotten about my blonde, very Parisian looking girlfriend Ellie. All I was thinking about was Anna. And that skirt.

Earlier that night, the normally denim jeans clad Anna, entered the lobby, instantly putting me in a state of shock and longing. I'm pretty sure my jaw had hit the floor. They were the longest legs I'd ever seen. She just looked so incredibly sexy. The staring continued until Anna wrapped her coat around herself, moving my attention back to her face. There was no way she could not have seen me looking; I was about as subtle as Big Ben striking upon the hour. A quick glance at her revealed that yes, she had seen me. There she was, looking back at me with a little half smirk on her lips. Yep, she definitely saw the longing in my eyes. Also, my jaw being on the floor probably was a clear indicator of what was going through my mind.

'Think of anything else St. Clair' I told myself as we were walking to the pub.

5 drinks later, Anna came stumbling out of the crowd, breath less from all the dancing, looking sexier than ever. She was definitely drunk since she ignored the personal space boundaries that we had both established, and was talking to me with only centimetres between our lips. But then, I was obviously plastered since I agreed to dance with her. She grabbed my hand and led me into the crowd.

There were people everywhere and as we went deeper into the crowd, it got harder and harder to move. When we stopped, our bodies were pinned to each other. The band started playing a cover, Besoin De Rien by The Hellboys, and the place when off. The song has that perfect balance of attitude and buoyancy that it will get anyone dancing.

Anna boldly grabbed my hands and placed them on her hips. She positioned her arms around my neck, my hands rested on her lower back, reducing the space between us even further. Our bodies started moving together as we got lost in the rhythm. We were thrashing and convulsing in time to the beat and it was if nothing else existed except us and the music. She was mesmerising.

I needed to be closer to her. I had truly become lost in the moment. Nothing else existed or even mattered except my need for her.

Daringly, I bent my head so that my lips were just grazing the skin of her neck, right on her pulse, and continued to sing the lyrics to the song. Anna's reaction to the movement of my lips on her neck was immediate. She gripped the front of my shirt and slightly tilted her head back, allowing me more access. She fought back by slowly grinding her hips against mine, leaving no gaps between our bodies. I crumpled in defeat, snapping my head backward and simply relished the moment.

Anna only stopped the movement to slowly drop her body down mine, trailing her hands over my chest as she did so. My eyes closed and I let out a small moan. I wondered if she was torturing me on purpose. She couldn't know just how much she was affecting me. We were normally both so careful around one another. Obviously we were both drunker than we thought; the normal side effects of increase confidence and lack of consideration to the consequences was occurring.

The heat and the tension from moments before slowly began to subside. It was still there, however the urgency had reduced and we were simply enjoying the atmosphere of the pub. We continued singing and dancing until we were both so sweaty and dead tired that we could no longer move. In desperate need of water, I grabbed her hand and towed her to the bar. We were so delusional that we were laughing at everything and nothing at all.

But that's when the shit hit the fan and reality came and punched me in the face. Enter Phoebe Fontaine, the one and only roommate to Ellen, aka Ellie, aka my girlfriend.

My first thought was that I couldn't believe I got caught. But then that was replaced by anger at that fact that I was doing something in the first place that I knew I shouldn't have been doing. In that moment, there was no mistaking the fact that I was my father's son.

I had to see Ellie, right away. I had to fix this. I was not going to let this-my lack of self control- put an end to us like this.

What still confuses me is how upset Anna was. Her anger towards me was nothing compared to my own. I welcomed her anger, used it as fuel for my own.

Of course I went to Ellie. No way am I becoming like _him_, however easy it is for me to navigate this path. She was brutal, shrieking about the humiliation I have caused her. How embarrassed she feels to even be in the same room as Phoebe. How her friends already thought it was odd to be dating a boy still in high school, no matter how charming he is. On and on this went for hours.

It had been quiet for a while and she had stopped crying. She looked at me with a mix of determination and composure.

"Etienne. I don't like this... You have feelings for her don't you?"

I couldn't lie to her, not while looking straight to her face. Holding eye contact with her, my silence was enough of an answer for her.

"I want this to stop Etienne. I want it to stop now. This crush you have for Anna has got to stop."

She had lost that manic behaviour from before and looked at me with collectedness. Words began tumbling out of her mouth but they were well thought out. I felt as if I was a child being scolded.

"You and I are going to forget this happened okay? Forget that this silly little incident with that silly little high school girl even happened. Because deep down, if you're honest with yourself, you know that you and I are good for one another."

With that, the conversation was over. While she may seem egocentric at time, she can be just as determined when she wants to be.

Her words still echo in my head as I snap back to the present. Homework in the lobby. Today marks the 937th week of Anna's existence and a week since she started despising mine. Looking over at Anna, I notice she has put her hair up, exposing the side of her neck. I absentmindedly begin to hum Besoin De Rien by The Hellboys but stop instantly.

What am I going to do? We can't move forward without me ending things with Ellie. And I'm not even sure she wants to move forward. So, should I take the risk, break up with Ellie and see if things move forward with Anna? Or should I stay with Ellie, with what is easy, with what I know? I owe it to Ellie to try and work things out with her.

Anna and I are at a stale mate. We're stuck in a game of limbo. And not the fun type with a broom stick and festive music. But the awkward type with snide remarks, stolen glances and unresolved feelings.

Looking back to my books I let out a sigh. I miss our banter. And the way she would always listen to me drabble on about me mum. How she absentmindedly cleans when nervous. I miss my best friend.

Greaatttttt. Josh and Rashmi have now started using tongue. How, you might ask, do I know this? Because I have a front row viewing of the action as its happening, play by play. The status of their relationship is nearly as confusing as Anna's and my own and its easier just to roll with it.

Seriously, as if I don't have enough to feel sick about. Seeing their snogging session definitely isn't helping.

Maybe I should go ask Nate if he has a broom stick for limbo. At least that way, I could put an end to the 'Josh and Rashmi Pash show'. Plus it's known for being a good social ice breaker. I might see Anna's lips smile instead of form a scowl. There's no doubt she would smile. Its impossible not to be happy while listening to the bongos and playing limbo.

**Authors note:**

**So, I was reading the book again (as you do) and was reading the scene about Anna's birthday (Pages 274 to 275). My reaction to it the first time I read it was 'nawwww, is that it?'. The scene was good in that it gave you the impression that the moment was full of passion and need and shows them in a state where they have both (with the help of a little alcohol) let their guard down. But I was like 'come on Perkins, I need the deets!'. **

**So that's my reasoning for writing this fanfic. I would love to hear what people think. Even if you think its horrible, I would love to hear why you think so. Cause like, while writing this story, it makes complete sense in my head and the connections are clear as to what I'm referring to. But I **_**just**_** realised that it is most likely the case that no one understands what the heck I'm going on about. And it's always nice to know that someone read my story. The fact that I had 4 people comment on my last story resulted in many personal hi-fives (or PHF's as I like to call them. I keed, I don't have an abbreviation for them, haha). Now, I know there are stories with like four HUNDRED comments, so in comparison its nothing but I was so stoked that somewhere in the world there were 4 people who have read my story. **

**Now you see why I put my authors note at the end- I tend to ramble, haha. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Talking in your sleep**

'_Why haven't I talked about this with Rashmi before? It seems obvious now. Ofcourse she has inside information, because Etienne talks to Josh and Josh talks to Rashmi'_

_Perkins, 2010, pg 281._

_Ever wonder what could possibly be this insider information? I sure have. A one shot focused what I think a conversation between Etienne and Josh would include. Authors note at the end. _

"What the bloody hell does she see in him," I utter for the umpteenth time today.

I look over at Josh and see that he has given up pretending that he is listening and is now giving most of his attention to his sketch book. Book on his knees, back hunched over, hand gripping the pencil as it feverously moves over the page. He is focusing so hard it looks like he's head could explode.

"Dude, seriously, give it a rest," He replies in a bored tone, not even taking his eyes off of his book. I sigh, and look down at the copy of 'The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich: A History of Nazi Germany' that I brought with me to read. It has remained open on the same page for the last half an hour that we have been sitting here, on the steps outside of the Pantheon. Looking around, I can see that it is one of those days that hint spring is just around the corner. The sun is weakly shinning. The breeze only has a slight chill to it. People are everywhere, walking past the Pantheon without even giving us a glance. Some are still wearing coats but others have braved the weather and are only wearing a light cardigan. Children are dancing around the feet of their parents, weaving between the crowds of people coming at them from the opposite direction. Sometimes I like being able to just sit and people watch, oblivious from those around you as they rush past you to some unknown destination. It is enough to make a guy feel peaceful.

But then, it happens again. Just as it has for the last couple of days now, it pops into my head. I inwardly groan at the memory of seeing Anna and Higgenbaum snogging.

"But really, how can she fancy the bloke?" I say, ignoring his earlier protest and continue people watching.

"For one, he's gangly. And his teeth are absolutely shot. And he does that bloomin' thing with his-"

"Hair, constantly flicking it out of his eyes every 5 seconds," Josh interrupts, breaking me out of my trance, mimicking what I had said to him earlier. He has even copied the actions I had done, sweeping his forehead clean of imaginary hair.

His book and pencil have been discarded and he now stands, giving me a dead pan look.

"You know how I knew what you were going to say?" He says, looking down at me as I sit on the step. Continuing, he states, "Because, St. Clair, you have been saying the same damn thing for the past hour," then returns to his seat on the step.

"If you ask me, it sounds like some ones a wee bit jealous of Higgenbaum," he says, giving me a sideward glance before picking up his pencil and paper.

I give a scoff, and look at him flabbergasted.

"I am _not _jealous," I say, a little bit too quickly, eyebrows knitted while I continue to look at him dumbfounded. Josh gives a mock laugh, rolls his eyes and goes back to working on the page.

I have had the unfortunate luck for the past couple of days to see them basically everywhere I go. When I am on the way to the dining hall, there are Anna and Higgenbaum, Walking in front of me, holding hands. When I am making my way to the train in the evening, there is Anna with Higgenbaum's arm draped around her shoulder, sitting outside, hanging with his friends. It would make anyone sick.

"I'm not," a tad more composed this time. "It's just that as Anna's friend, I think that she could do a _lot _better than _David Higgenbaum,_" repulsed at the thought of him.

"Yeah, yeah, keep telling yourself that," He replies, eyes on the page.

"It's the truth. And besides," I pause, "I have a girlfriend of my own."

"Exactly," Josh chimes in, "Tall. Blonde. Heels that could break a mans foot if she had the right motivation." He gives me a knowing look, then continues his detailed sketch of a skull for his graphic novel, shading it so that it looks like it is about to come off the page.

I turn away from him, give a sigh and place my head in my hand, elbows resting on my knees.

Yes, my girlfriend Ellie.

"So, ah, how has she been since, you know..." he pauses, looking at me to continue.

Yeah, I know. Since the night we had that huge blow out and she told me to quote 'forget that the silly little incident with that silly little high school girl even happened' unquote.

"Yeah," I say, absentmindedly, biting my thumb nail, watching a little girl feed bread to the pigeons, despite the sign, "alright, I suppose."

Things have been far from alright. Since that night Ellie has been acting like a nutter. She says that I need to give her time to trust me again. I go over to her apartment and we barely even talk. We watch a movie in silence, sitting at either end of the couch and then I go home. Whenever her roommate is there, she gives me the death stare then leaves the room. Ellie has also gotten into the habit of dropping in to school to check up on me. As if she's going to stumble upon me and Anna doing something that would prove her cheating theory right. And the whole visit is spent arguing. We argue over the fact that she doesn't trust me anymore, that I do not need her checking up on me like a child, that I am not making enough effort in the relationship and so on and so forth.

"She says she is having difficulties trusting me," I say with a heave. Josh replies with a grunt. His shading has slowed down, and waiting for me to continue.

"I mean, I know I cocked up," I say, pushing the book off my lap, standing up and then pacing on step, "But I'm bloody trying to fix it," I say, arms waving for emphasis. Josh looks up, flexing his hand and wincing.

"Has your mom said anything about it?" he asks, continuing to stretch his hand.

I sigh, thinking back to the brief conversation I had with her about the subject. "You know. Basic motherly advice... 'Do what makes you happy'," mimicking her tone,"...I don't really want to worry her too much though."

I pick up a rock and start throwing it then catching it methodically. Josh watches me do this for a while but then picks up his pencil and continues shading.

I look up at the grand columns of the Pantheon. At the very top of the column, despite the netting, birds have still managed to build a nest. Two of them are currently flitting back and forth between the nest they are constructing and a pile of debris from the foot path. Looking past the top of the Pantheon, the sky reveals patches of blue, through white, cotton ball resembling clouds.

Anna always loves these types of days.

Eh.

Anna. I groan inwardly at the thought of her.

She and Higgenbuam are probably somewhere enjoying the day together. They're probably eating éclairs while he rambles on to her about something bloody stupid. Like the quickest ways to get 'wasted' on a low budget. They're most likely teeth gnashing at this very moment.

Eh. That thought does not please me.

Frustrated, I chuck the stone. Josh looks up from his work, slightly alarmed.

"Are you definite she heard me tell her that I like her?" I ask.

He gives me a tiered look. Probably due to this being the tenth time I have asked him this very question.

"Yes." He exclaims tediously, giving me an eye roll, then huddles over his book.

I groan and slump my shoulders in defeat. Me head is killing me. I retrieve my book which landed open on the page I was reading and plonk myself back down on the step. Once again, I ignore the book and opt for watching the birds as they make their nest, letting my mind wander, chewing on my thumb nail again.

I have run that night over and over and over in my head, so many times that I feel like I am actually making the whole thing up. I know I told her. I was pissed, so the memory is a little shaky but I know I did. I just do not understand why she would lie to me. It probably has something to do with the fact she isn't interested and so to save my feelings, she just pretended I said nothing. It is nicer than turning me down to my face I guess. It wouldn't hurt as bad if she wasn't rejecting me for bloody Dave. It puts me in a toxic mood just thinking about it.

"I bought her love poetry!" I frustratingly state, throwing my head back in frustration, "how obvious, can a bloke be?"

"I know right?" Josh responds, eyes glued to his sketch, "And here I was thinking that TELLING HER would be the most obvious way," addressing me in monotone.

I roll my eyes and ignore his previous comment. I see that a couple have come to occupy a seat a few steps down. They are in full on physical display of affection mode. Joy. I am pretty sure I just saw tongue. Uh, it's pathetic how much I envy them right now.

My mind wanders, back to Anna.

We're in her room, sitting side by side on her bed, shoulders touching, alone, like we were on the thanksgiving break. I move forward to tuck her blonde streak behind her ear, letting my hand linger on the side of her face. Unlike the time in the dining hall, I follow the action up with a kiss. I lean in, and press my lips to hers. She responds, moving her lips against mine. She knots her fingers in the hair at the nape of my neck. I place my other hand on her lower back, holding her to me. The kiss gets heated. Our breathing becomes heavier. I push her back against the bed, feeling all of her pressed against me. She arches her back, diminishing the space between us, entwining her legs with mine. My tongue traces the outline of her round, apricot shaded lower lip. The hand on her cheek slowly travels down her neck, shoulder, down her arm and comes to a rest on her hip. I softly bite her lip, and then leave a trail of kisses down to her neck. She leans her head back, giving me more access. Her breathing is coming out in pants. She utters my name with a sigh, urging me on. My hand slowly grazes on the revealed flesh on her lower hip, between her shirt and trousers. Slowly, I inch it underneath her top. My fingers lightly trail along her sigh. She takes in a sharp breath. Impatiently, she moves my lips back to hers. The kiss gets deeper as my hands explore her body. '_Etienne'_, I hear her whisper, making me just as impatient-WOAH.

I snap out of the thought, shaking my head to clear it. Not the place St. Clair, not the place. Also, probably not appropriate thoughts to have when you have a girlfriend, unless similar themed thoughts are about said girlfriend.

"Take it from me," Josh announces, reminding me of his presence, "Staying with a person in a loveless relationship for no other reason than keeping up appearances never works," His tone despising, the way it always is whenever he speaks of his parents. His hands only half heartedly move across the page.

"Sure, everything might look peachy on paper, but in actual fact, together they suck." He addresses me now, forgetting his sketch pad altogether.

He glances back down at his page briefly before looking back at me.

"You'll be fine." He confidently replies, "You'll both be fine," then looks back down at his page. By the intensity of his gaze on the page, he is probably going to be as articulate as a rock here on out.

I sigh again, looking up to the sky with elbows on knees, my chin in my hand.

Why couldn't this decision be easier?

On the one hand, I should give my relationship with Ellie another chance. We have been through so much together; I at least owe it to what we used to have to give this a whole hearted try.

But then again, there is no denying that I feel something for Anna. It isn't fair on either Ellie or me if I stay in this relationship simply because I am too scared of Anna rejecting me and being alone.

Gaahhhhhhh.

Why can't it be as easy as it is when you're a kid? For starters, you're fearless, willing to try new things, despite the fact you might fail. Also, you have someone else to make your decisions, someone else to blame when things go wrong. Even now, me Dad has the final say on all things important to me. This is the first real decision of real importance that I have to make on my own. Do I ignore my feelings for Anna and try and make things work again with Ellie? Or do I take a chance with Anna, even if that means I could possibly be alone if she doesn't like me back?

It is all just too confusing.

My eyes focus upon the couple on the steps bellow us. One of the birds has started collecting twigs on the step that they are sitting on. Fingers crossed the bird accidently drops something on them causing their love fest to cease. That would definitely be more entertaining to watch and better reflect my current mood on love and all things associated.

**Authors note:**

**Hi all! Sorry it has taken me so long to write this. I had a severe case of writers block plus I started writing something else. **

**Firstly, thank you to those people who have read the story! And also to those who have left a review! And sorry to those people who left a guest review as I didn't know you had to confirm them! Unfortunately they get deleted if you don't confirm them within 38 hours or something. But I read them before they disappeared out into the universe. They were really lovely and definitely motivated me to finish writing! **

**Okay, so onto my reasoning for this chapter...  
>In Anna and the French kiss, Anna makes reference to the fact she should have gone to Rashmi earlier because Etienne would have spoke to Josh and Josh would have told Rashmi. That influenced me to write this chapter. I thought it would be interesting to write a scene about a situation where Etienne and Josh discuss the whole AnnaEllie issue. Plus, who doesn't want to read more about Etienne and Josh's bromance? **


	4. Chapter 4

**Carbon bubbles**

_Authors note at the end... Enjoy! _

I feel like I am possessed.

I cannot remember smiling so much in my life. They say that love does that to a person though, do they not?

It is half past eleven on Sunday morning and I am standing outside of room 408, Anna's room. Last night was one of the happiest evenings of by life by far. And that is despite the fact that I was at the top of the bell tower of Notre Dame. I guess kissing a beautiful girl for hours triumphs a fear of heights.

I smile at the memory and swipe my thumb over my lips that are still tender from the kissing. It was amazing, sitting high above the rooftops of Paris, in our own little world. Her lips were demanding and moved fluidly over mine. My hands started out on her face but moved lower to rest on her hips as the kissing became deeper. She moved hers to the nape of my neck in my hair, gripping it between her fingers.

I shake my head, putting a stop to the path my mind was drifting down. It is definitely inappropriate to have those thoughts in the middle of a public hallway.

Seeing her and telling her my feelings was kind of a spur of the moment thing though. I had already agreed to meet my father for dinner to further discuss 'the college issue' as he put it, so I had to leave rather than spend the rest of the night with her like I would have preferred. So I asked her if she would go on a date with me, which is why I am standing outside her door now.

She has to have known I have left my room, considering mine is right above hers and I am about as quiet as a bull in a china shop. If I stand here any longer she is going to be suspicious of what took me so long.

To prevent looking like a twat any longer, I reach up and knock on her door.

I am suddenly overcome by nerves. I should have brought her something, flowers or chocolate. What is it taking so long opening the door?

The handle rattles before me and I take a step back as she opens the door.

I feel light headed. She is standing there in a mint green loose fitting knitted sweater, a pair of cut off jeans that reach mid thigh and reveal most of her long legs. Holy cripes. I stare at her legs for probably a moment too long before my eyes snap back up to her face. I notice that her hair is pinned back to reveal more of her stripe.

'Hi Etienne,' she greets me, pushing her hair back behind her ear as she does so.

My eyes remain on her hair as I respond.

'You have perfect hair.'

Oh god, did I say that out aloud. I am such a moron. Anna only stands there with a small smile on her lips, her eyes glowing straight into mine making me want to kiss her again, right here in the hall.

Calm it St Claire. You are going to scare her off.

But she only looks how I feel; dazed. I bight my pinkie nail, willing myself to have some self control.

'You ready to go?' I ask, throwing my thumb in the direction of the stairs.

She nods, closing and locking the door, giving me a chance to look at her legs a little without her knowing.

We make our way down the flight of stairs. Sunday usually means catch up on assignments and reading but given the fact most of our classes are just starting new units, there is no real rush to finish homework. The dorms are basically empty, people taking the opportunity to sleep in on a Sunday before the craziness of exams and the inevitable late nights and early mornings that will be dedicated to study.

We are almost out of the building when I hear my name being called.

'St. Clair! Anna! Wait up,'

I turn to see Meredith and Rashmi heading towards us.

'Hey, we were just about to head out for some food, you guys wana join?' Meredith asks.

Things haven't been as bad as expected between Mer and me. At first there was awkwardness between us over the fact I mislead her for so long, however, we have talked since the day in Luxembourg gardens and it is good to have my friend back. Still, that does not stop the sudden nerves that spring upon me as I realise Mer and Rash have caught me taking Anna on our first date. I look over to Anna and see that her cheeks are slightly tinged pink.

'Well, actually, um,' I utter tongue-tied, looking from Mer and Rash to Anna, 'Anna and I were actually going to go see a movie or something,'

'Oh great!' Mer exclaims, clapping her heavily ringed hands together, 'that sounds good,'

'Yeah, we'll come to, let me just text Josh to tell him the plan' Rash replies, reaching in her pocket to retrieve her phone.

'Well, actually, ah,' Anna splutters, nervously looking at me.

'Yeah, um, we actually wanted to go alone,' I say abruptly, trying to redeem our date.

'Oh. OH,' Rash shouts and it's like you can see the light bulb go off in both of their head as they take in Anna and my proximity to one another, 'You're going on a date!'

'ha, ha,' I laugh awkwardly, Anna chiming in with a chorus of her own.

I try gauging their reactions, especially Mer's, 'actually, yes, we are.'

There's pregnant pause as the four of us stand in the lobby waiting for someone to speak up.

'About time,' Mer speaks up, 'that's great news!'

'Naw, St. Clair, are you blushing?' Rash says, poking my cheek in the process.

'No,' I wave away her hand away, 'now, if you don't mind, we're going to be leaving now,'

I reach over to Anna and grab her upper arm, dragging her behind me.

'See you,' Anna calls out over her shoulder.

'Aw, aren't they the cutest?' Rash calls out teasingly.

'Totally,' Mer replies, 'don't be out too long now?'

We hurry out the building, leaving behind us the sounds of laughing and kissing noises.

I guess that's one way of telling everyone Anna and I are dating. I look over at her to see if she's embarrassed or anything but she seems fine.

It's a beautiful spring day as we walk further and further, leaving SOAP behind us. The sun is warm and there is only a slight breeze which carries with it the faint smell of tulips. People are out and about, eating, walking their dogs, sitting reading. It's a great atmosphere. Anna is in the middle of retelling a conversation she had with her brother Seany. She's explaining that he was excited about going back to school tomorrow because they just learnt a new game called toilet tiggy. Apparently, if you get tagged, you have to kneel as if you were a toilet and the only way you can continue playing is if someone sits on your knee and pretends to go to the toilet, which Seany found hilarious. She's talking with wild hand gestures and laughing at Seany's reaction. I admire how much she cares for her brother. She radiates warmth whenever she mentions him and you just know she loves him a great deal.

She finally takes a breath and looks over to see me staring at her.

'Sorry,' she says, looking at her feet as she tucks her hair behind her ear, 'I am talking way too much.'

'No,' I reply truthfully, 'I love hearing your stories about Seany.'

We have walked all the way from SOAP to the Seine and we are just about to cross over to the Notre Dame. The bridge has hundreds of locks on it with couples' names on them and we look at a couple as we cross over.

Having the Notre Dame in sight is making me think about yesterday afternoon.

For some reason I am nervous. Which is ridiculous, especially considering I already told her I love her and she said she loves me. But does that mean I can just kiss her whenever I want? I am so used to having Anna as my best friend and the girl I long for. I plan on there being lots of kissing. How do I make that happen?

Looking at her, it is as if nothing has changed between us. She is walking with her arms slightly swinging at her sides, the sleeves of her sweeter pulled over her hands as her eyes follows the pebble she is kicking along the cobble stones with her black canvas shoes.

Is it too early to say this is what I want for forever? Anna with her easy stride and her gap toothed grin framed by plump apricot coloured lips. Lips that I can kiss whenever I so wish, that is.

As we continue walking the cobbled streets, Anna has picked up on the fact I have been blatantly staring. She continues talking but I can tell that she is also nervous. Her hands have come out of the sleeves of her jumper and she has begun tucking and untucking her stripe. For some reason, it was so easy to tell her how I was feeling yesterday while we were sitting in the bell tower of Notre dame. The adrenalin from climbing those stairs must have made me high or something. Maybe I should climb the Arc De Triumph or sky dive because at the moment I feel like a blundering awkward teenager. She reaches for her hair again so I intercept, grabbing her wrist and bringing her hand to rest on my chest.

'I'm nervous too, see?' my heart beat kicking up a notch as if to prove this point. She gives me a shy smile, not taking her eyes from mine and nods. I move her hand from my chest, to my lips to give the back of it a quick kiss, and move my hand down her arm to link our hands as if it is the most casual thing in the world. She smiles at me and it feels like a weight has been lifted and everything is easy again.

We skip the movie and instead walk hand in hand, in the direction of the Louvre. As we walk we talk about school, our families, college next year. Before we know it, we are strolling through the beautiful Jardin des Tuileries. We reach the pond at the Champs-Élysées end of the gardens where there is a pond. People are lounging around the pool in green metal chairs, sitting and just being in Paris. Luckily, there are two seats free next to one another, so we join the people and just be, sitting in a comfortable silence. We are sitting at a great vantage point in terms of seeing the symmetry of Paris. To our left is the Louvre, the tiny glass pyramid glinting in the sunlight and to our right is the Arc De Triumph in all its mighty.

It truly is a marvellous afternoon. The sun is shining down on us and there are even more people around than there were earlier in the day. I look over at Anna and see that she had her eyes closed, head tilted to the sky soaking up the sun's rays. Her lips are slight parted.

I suddenly am yearning for her lips. To trace kissed down her jaw to her collar bone and back. My fantasy is abruptly put to an end. Anna's eyes have popped open suddenly and she is looking straight into mine. Her eyes darken the longer we look at each other, the silence and tension between us continuing.

'Shall we head back?' she asks, never breaking eye contact.

'Sounds good,' I respond, still trapped in her stare.

She stands and pulls me up with her, staying close to me as we make our way back to the SOAP dorms.

The mood between us has changed. On the way here, we were Anna and Etienne, best friends who could talk the house down. But now there is this energy, bouncing between us, keeping me on edge, anticipating when it's going to break. The back of our hands brush, and I get this rush.

I have to kiss her.

She has to feel it too. I catch her looking at me with the same look from when we were at the pond and that day in Luxembourg gardens. Each time I do, it excitement and something else-lust?-shoots through me.

The dorms are quite when we return. Everyone must be out enjoying the sun.

'Want to come up to my room?' she asks once we're in the stair well.

She says it casually, however, avoids making eye contact. I agree and we make our way to room 408. She unlocks the door, lets me in and then closes it after her. We stand without talking in the middle of her room, surrounded by her mini desk, mini dresser with her collection of banana and elephant figurines lined up on it, mini bed with its ironed bed sheets, and mini shower. We're quite for a while until Anna moves closer to her bed, tucking in the bottom right corner of her bed spread. I smile at the action but it quickly diminishes at the sight of her jumper riding up on one side, showing a small sliver of her lower back.

My mind explodes as electricity shoots through my whole body, igniting me.

I take a breath to clear my head and cough to draw Anna's attention back to me.

'I, ah, have something for you,' she looks at me with a surprised expression as I reach into my pocket and retrieve the small velveteen maroon pouch. I dangle it in front of her, and she reaches for it.

'Etienne,' my heart pounds at the mention of my name, like it has for the thousandth time today, 'thank you,' sincerity dripping from her voice.

'Don't thank me just yet,' I say, jokingly, suddenly nervous again, despite the fact today when swimmingly well, 'you don't even know what it is,'

Her attention goes back to the gift. She pulls on the drawstring keeping the pouch closed and empties its contents onto her palm. On her palm sits a finely woven sparkly silver chain. She moves her hand closer to her face to examine the gift, spreading it out on her palm.

She looks up at me with warm eyes and moves closer to kiss my cheek.

'It's beautiful Etienne,' she tells me in a near whisper, eyes focused on mine, setting my heart on fire again.

'Well,' I start, my mind foggy from her proximity, 'you see, it's actually an expansion gift. I bought it to go with the glass bead I gave you for Christmas. You know? the banana?'

I move my hand up to tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear. She slowly nods her head, as her eyes travel down to my lips then back up to my eyes, making it hard not to lean in and kiss her. I look down at her out stretched palm that still holds the necklace and pluck it from her to dangle it between my fingers.

'If you tread the necklace through the hole of the bead, you can wear it,' I look away from her eyes, suddenly doubting the gift and anxious that I have wrongly assumed she would want to wear it.

'Only if you want to of course,' I add, peeking up at her through my eyelashes to gauge her response.

'Of course I do,' she responds, not even pausing before she moves over to her dressing table to pick up the small yellow bead.

'Would you mind?' she timidly asks with her hand outreached to me, the banana pinched between her thumb and index finger.

I thread the bead onto the thin silver chain, and move it with the bead on it over her head, resting it on her chest. I hold the ends of the chain and she slowly gathers her hair to the side with one hand, exposing her neck to me. I join the clasp together and gently place the chain down on the nape of her neck.

The moment suddenly has heaviness to it and I haven't made a move to remove my hands from the top of her shoulders. I do though when she slowly rotates to face me. She picks up the dangling bead, looking at it for a while, and then releases it, dropping it back to her chest.

She seems to notice how close we are now that she is facing at me. Her chest, along with the bead, begins to move up and down slightly faster.

'I _love_ it,' she utters so intensely, putting a slow emphasis on the word love, making my heart rate spike.

'I'm glad that you _love_ it,' I respond with a gulp, then move my gaze down to her soft, apricot coloured lips.

Slowly, Anna moves her hand to rest on my shoulder, and then trails it lightly down my arm to link our fingers. She gives my palm a squeeze, drawing my attention back to her eyes. But it seems her eyes aren't focused on mine either, but my mouth. It feels like my love for her is bleeding out of my every pore, slowing down my breathing and clogging up my brain, sending warmth out throughout my whole body.

I zone back onto her lips, loving the small smile that is spreading across them, noticing that they are slightly closer than they were before.

'Etienne,' she speaks softly, 'I love you,'

And I swear, watching her lips form those words is the best sight I have ever seen.

Our lips collide and our bodies close in on one another, leaving no space between us. My hands move to her hips, pinning them to mine, while Anna mover her hands into my hair, slightly tugging on it, making me wild. Colours are bursting behind my eye lids and each time her lips part, her warm breath tickles mine. My tongue grazes her plump lower lip. She tastes like oranges and honey and it is putting my head in a spin. I nip at her lip and suck it with mine, causing her to let out a short, deep sigh. She links her arms behind my head and as we continue kissing, I move us towards her mini bed. The same bed we slept on together during the thanksgiving break where I fantasised about doing just this. The realisation makes the blood rush from my brain to other parts of my body.

Anna halts when the back of her legs meet her mattress and I slowly lead her to lie down on it. Looking down at her, she is beautiful with her hair fanned out across her pillow, her chest moving heavily and her half lidded eyes hungrily on mine. I hover over her and lean down to continue the kiss, placing one hand on her opposite hip, the other on the side of her face. Anna's hands move to grip my shoulders.

I cannot picture a time where I will ever be over the way she makes me feel. Kissing Anna is like that moment when you open a bottle of soft drink and carbonated bubbles shoot up to the surface and go crazy. Except its constant and makes me feel light headed but at the same so certain of my feelings for her.

She is making me crazy.

Sudden laughing from the hallway splits us up. Our lips break apart and we both look at each other with the expression of suddenly being caught doing something we shouldn't have been doing. Big breaths of air leave our mouths in unison; in and out, in and out.

I roll off of her, and lie on my back, pinning myself between her and the wall.

'Stupid band-aid thin walls,' she mutters slightly annoyed, breathe still slightly hitched.

I look over at Anna. She laying there with her hair all over the place, lips slightly puffy, cheeks stained red with an irritated look on her face. Suddenly, I find everything to be absurd. My head snaps back with the laugh that exploded from my chest. Everything is just too good to be true, how oh how is this not one of my fantasies?

'What?' she asks me, 'what's so funny?'

Concern suddenly fills her eyes as I continue laughing at the wonderful course my life has taken me. The cackle stops dead in my chest when I notice her worry.

I am one hundred percent sure that this is what I want forever.

'Anna,' I ask her plainly, 'would you be my girlfriend?'

The shock is evident on her face and you can see that she is taken back by my forwardness.

'Yes please.' She answers, a slow gap toothed grin sliding on her face.

With her words, a soft drink bottle is opened in my chest. I feel light and happy and it doesn't fade.

I kiss her stripe, and grin as I relax back onto her bed. Her arms wind around me and she wedges herself to my side.

And that is that. Anna Oliphant is my girlfriend and I her boyfriend.

_Authors note:  
>Hi there!<br>Firstly, I just wanted to thank those people who have left comments or followed the story. It really means a lot and definitely helped spur me on when writing this chapter. It took me such a long time to think of the plot for this chapter. So I did what I usually do; re read the book. When I was re reading it, I wondered what happened between Etienne and Anna after the Notre Dame event. Did they just walk down the bell tower hand in hand and they were instantly together? I thought it would be cute to see what would happen on their first official date and how their friends would react to their date.  
>Hopefully you enjoy it as much as I did writing it. <em>

_You can find me on tumblr at .com if you would like to pop in and say hello._

_Many thanks! _


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